All three of my brothers have gone through the the process of filling out Mission papers, and being the only girl in the family has brought circumstances that I didn’t really foresee. The first of which is the amount of opposition that has occurred due to my strong desire to serve the Lord on a Mission.
So since I was 16 I knew I wanted to serve a Mission and for over two years (I know the irony) I was so excited to start my papers. That was where the first hurdle came.
My Mother has never been the most supportive of my brother’s Mission so when he told her that he had received his call in the mail she did not show up for him opening it and later that day told me that I should promise her that I would not follow in my brothers’ footsteps and serve. Why she said such a thing was never revealed to me and when she started talking about how she could only trust her daughter to get married soon and not to waste her time on a Mission. I didn’t know how to react. My Mother who only goes to church maybe two times a year telling me that a Mission would break her heart and that she would not support me if I did. My heart was broken. Often in my baby book I reflect on a certain page. A page which my brother wrote one sentence about my baby blessing. I was blessed 18 years ago that I would serve a Mission. She knew this day would come, it was just a matter of time.
With this problem, with much prayer, I decided not to tell my Mother about serving a Mission until I am about to leave. When she could do nothing to stop me. This is one hurdle I fear will stick with me, for she has yet to email or talk to my brother.
So I started my papers recently, OK so maybe not THAT recent but it’s recent to me. During this whole process I have received many blessings and many obstacles in my way. One of such obstacles is an authority figure of mine, who will stay anonymous, who often changes their mind about things pertaining to my papers.
So today marks a week ’til I was supposed to turn in my Mission papers it’s so hard knowing that it won’t be completed in time. I have finished the papers in general, all the medical forms are done and online it is completely finished. The main problem is not in the papers themselves, but it is in the finances that go into papers. Who knew that you had to have a certain amount of money in your bank account before you could submit them?I sure did not. That is where the problem lays. My family are not too well off and with another family member on a Mission currently it is hard for my of the leaders where I am submitting my papers to understand how my family can support another child leaving to serve the Lord.
It’s hard for me to understand when someone who is supposed to help often is the one telling you that you can not. It has come to the point when my Mission is mentioned the first thing that comes up is money. Not the service. Not my desire. Not the Lord. It seems to me that materials of the world are what is holding me back from things of Heaven.
This hurdle often connects to other hurdles. I recently got a job so I could save up more money for my Mission. I will miss the next semester of college just so I can work to save up enough money for my Mission. It has come to the point where I soon will have to get others involved with my papers who normally are not at this level.
Now the reason I wrote this was to rant to someone but also to help others who also might be going through opposition in their lives regarding them deciding to serve.
One this that has kept me going toward my Mission and not getting discouraged is what all this opposition means. It means that I will make such a big difference to so many lives, that I will help others in ways that makes Satan scared. He is scared of what I can and will do. I will be such a great missionary and help in so many ways that Satan is trying everything he can to stop me from serving. I am thankful for this opposition but at the same time it is very hard to go through. I know that in the end this will all be worth it.
So to those who are struggling with the hurdles against you serving, the valleys, the pits, the mountains, and the temptations. These things will make you stronger, they will make your desire to serve others that much stronger. If only you endure. If Heavenly Father has told you to serve him, then that is what you do. It’s only a matter of time that separates you.
The only tips I can give you, are these:
~ Pray, and keeping praying, never underestimate how much prayer can change something.
~ Don’t be afraid to get others involved, if something doesn’t seem right, don’t question it your feelings, just go through with it.
~ It is OK to cry. It is normal to feel discouraged and upset.
~ No matter what happens, don’t let others distract you from what God has told you.
~ You are always loved. Never forget that.
‘Till next time